Episode 21: The Teacher As Connector with Monique Pillow Gnanaratnam

Transcribed by https://otter.ai

Melissa Milner 0:09

Hi, this is Melissa Milner. Welcome to The Teacher As… podcast. The goal of this weekly podcast is to help you explore your passions and learn from others in education and beyond to better your teaching. The Teacher As… will highlight uncommon parallels to teaching as well as share practical ideas for the classroom. In this episode, I interview Monique Pillow Gnanaratnam. I met Monique when I taught both her daughters in fifth grade. We hit it off immediately, and she is always a pleasure to talk to. Monique works at Brandeis University in Massachusetts, and takes her work very seriously. To describe her as passionate is an understatement. Enjoy my chat with Monique and make sure to check out her guest blog post on theteacheras.com.

Welcome, my old friend, Monique.

Monique Gnanaratnam 1:00

Yes, yay.

Melissa Milner 1:03

So can you tell the listeners a little bit about yourself?

Monique Gnanaratnam 1:06

Absolutely. First and foremost, I wanted to say it is so good to be with you. Just very, very good to be back in touch with you. I am from Ohio, small town in Ohio. So I'm a transplant to Massachusetts, but have probably been in Massachusetts now longer than I was in Ohio. Family is extremely important to me. So as you can imagine, during this time of COVID I really, it's really tough. Not being able to see my parents or my brother or my sister. But to say the least, family is extremely important. And that definitely is what carries us through. So we do some Zoom meetings and some WhatsApp and whatever else. Another thing I would say I'm an introvert, not many people believe that. I'm an extrovert for a living. It's what I tell people. And I think too once you become a parent, you're automatically become an extrovert, whether you want to or not. What else would I say about myself? I am an Associate Dean of Students at Brandeis University, which means I work in student affairs, and I work with college students that may be anywhere between the age of 17. You never know, with college, so and you know any age. I also I am a mom, I'm a parent. So I have two children and time flies. Time flies.

Melissa Milner 3:08

So wait, let me see. They're not both out of high school.

Monique Gnanaratnam 3:13

No, I have one who is out of high school and is in college. And...

Melissa Milner 3:20

Amazing.

Monique Gnanaratnam 3:22

Amazing. And my other child is a freshman in high school.

Melissa Milner 3:29

Oh my goodness. That's incredible. I had both of them in fifth grade.

Monique Gnanaratnam 3:34

And you did.

Melissa Milner 3:36

Wonderful children. wonderful parents.

Monique Gnanaratnam 3:38

Thank you.

Melissa Milner 3:40

You were so supportive and so fun. just so much fun. We, we definitely clicked from like the moment we met.

Monique Gnanaratnam 3:47

Absolutely. And you, you also were wonderful. So right back at you.

Melissa Milner 3:54

Can you tell us more about what your job is like? What do you do? What is a typical day look like?

Monique Gnanaratnam 4:01

Absolutely. I'm going to say that there are definitely a lot of similarities between our jobs and our roles. No doubt about that at all.First and foremost, that means it is very difficult to explain what a typical day looks like. Okay. You simply never know what is going to happen from time to time. I will definitely say that we would definitely share... and being in an... I work at an institution where my job in general is to do a lot of triage work. Behavioral intervention is a huge part of my job. The health and the wellness and the safety, if you will, of our students is of the utmost importance. And I think that definitely is something that is a thread in the work that we do. I work with a team of colleagues. To ensure that our students' health and safety and wellness is of importance, and I address issues of concern, and I provide resources to students. So that's a lot of what I do.

Melissa Milner 5:15

I'm fascinated by this. Obviously, these are college-age students. Are you working with them? Or are you working with people, the people who are working with them? Do you get to work on a daily basis with the students themselves.

Monique Gnanaratnam 5:32

So, I do work with students on a daily basis. I've been in higher ed, wow 20 some years, probably getting close to 30. So I've had various roles that I have played. I am, for example, not in it with students every day, the way that I was, when I was, say, Director for the intercultural center and for the gender sexuality center, or when I worked with orientation, or when I've worked with off campus students, and the list goes on and the things that I've been afforded the opportunity to do. However, in this role, I do work directly with students, I also work with colleagues and I work with parents, family members, loved ones, in regard to students situations and matters. A lot of the work that I do, as I said, is triage. So, some of my work can be very harrowing. But my work includes suicide, suicide ideation, mental health and support. Right now we have you can imagine a lot of situations in matters that come into play with COVID in families and loved ones. I also co-chair, our care team at Brandeis, which is our Behavioral Intervention Team.

Melissa Milner 7:03

Wow.

Monique Gnanaratnam 7:04

Yeah, there are a lot of things that come up on our radar, again, a similarity to what my colleagues would also come into, come into play with on a K through 12 level.

Melissa Milner 7:17

Were you trained in psychology? Were you trained in education? Suicidal ideation, you know, you don't learn about that when you're learning about teaching.

Monique Gnanaratnam 7:28

No, so to say the least, I did not even know that such a field of higher education existed. I was preparing to graduate from college with a degree in communications, visual and verbal communications. And my minor was in English. And I was wondering, what am I going to do when I graduate? And I was talking to the director for Career Services at my institution. And she said, "Monique, I think you'd be great in higher ed, in college student personnel." And I said, "What is that?" So she went on to share with me that she had her degree in higher education. And she went on to name all of these wonderful administrators that I'd work with my entire time at the institution, going to school there and had no idea that these folks had received degrees in higher education and Student Affairs, and that it was a field. So the director for Residence Life, the director for, I don't know, financial aid, the person who was our dean of students, etc. All of these people were working in this field of higher education, people who were dedicated to ensuring that I grew and that I learned and learned and that I developed as a person and as a student. Well, I thought that was great. And I was sold. There are many things that I thought that I was going to do. I always wanted to work with people. At one point, I may have thought that I was going to be in journalism. I thought I was going to be an anchor person. At one point on the news. I wanted to be Oprah.

But I received a wonderful education and I was able to do a lot of internships and discovers some things that I was interested in and some things that I was not. The interesting thing about this field is that you get to do some of everything. Everything that I learned in regard to communications, verbal and nonverbal, I've had the opportunity to do. With this degree, you learn the theory of college students and education. Who knew? I found it very, very interesting. In addition to that, I also took counseling courses as well, I do not have a degree in counseling, I could have stayed and take an extra year of graduate school. And I would have had my degree in counseling. And there are often times where I think, why didn't I do that? I would have when I was ready to go. You know what Masters programs are like you, you finish four years of undergrad, and then you go right into your masters.

Melissa Milner 10:25

But it's amazing. Some of the work that you've done is counseling.

Monique Gnanaratnam 10:30

A lot of my work. Absolutely, absolutely. And the other thing that makes my job successful, is really all the lessons that I learn every day. Everything that I do, has a lesson to it. And as long as I take that lesson in, I'm continuing to develop. Truly learning is a lifelong process. I'm humbled every day, by the work that I do. I absorb a lot. And it's an honor, I truly believe that it's an honor to do what I do. And admittedly, the work is hard. And when I say absorb not only what I'm learning, but I absorb a lot. Because...because the conversations that I am engaged in with our students are oftentimes tough conversations. It's so it truly is triage.

Melissa Milner 11:33

Yeah.

Monique Gnanaratnam 11:34

Connecting the students to the resources that they need.

Melissa Milner 11:37

Yes. Do you have issues of equity at Brandeis? And is, is there bullying? Is there racism that's overt or not overt? Microaggressions? And are you finding that that's something you're having to work on?

Monique Gnanaratnam 11:52

Absolutely. Now, you know on the college level, like many institutions, we have an Office of Diversity, Equity, and inclusion. But diversity, equity, and inclusion is not just about one office, it really is about the entire community. Everything that you said, Brandeis is a microcosm of what's happening outside of our... of our bubbles. It's the real deal. And I didn't necessarily mean to mention Brandeis, I'm not necessarily talking as a person who is representing the institution. So, I will just simply say that the work that I do, as would be the work that happens at any college diversity, equity, and inclusion is a microcosm of what's happening outside of our bubbles. My role as as the role of any of our offices is to respond. Whether it is addressing the carbon footprint, whether it's the need for an Asian Studies program. Students push us and that's how we grow. So I often say to people, if you work in Student Affairs, you shouldn't be afraid of students. If you work on a chicken farm, you shouldn't be afraid of chickens. I do not work on a chicken farm. Right? I don't work on a chicken farm because I don't want to necessarily step in the chicken stuff. I don't want to have to reach up underneath them to take out the eggs or retrieve them. I don't want to be pecked by the...by the chickens. But students? You know, I signed up for that. I... I enjoy working with them.

Melissa Milner 13:36

Do you have a passion that maybe is outside of your actual work, but it informs your work,

Monique Gnanaratnam 13:43

Wow. People are my passion. So, that really helps and assists. I find that I have volunteered a lot in my town. I have sat on the Human Relations Advisory Committee. I have assisted with some of the town conversations that have just allow us the opportunity to sit down around a table and just talk to one another. And talk about various issues and topics that just include what makes our community welcoming. Topics of what is change, and how does change affect our community. These various examples, I think, have a good indication of how I feel about community and a college campus is all about community. And so my work informs my life and my life informs my work.

Melissa Milner 14:54

That makes a lot of sense.

Monique Gnanaratnam 14:56

And also being a being a parent also is a passion. It is what it is. But you do have to be passionate about it and everything that comes along with it.

Melissa Milner 15:07

You're amazing. Monique, I have to say, You're so great.

Monique Gnanaratnam 15:11

Oh, my goodness, no, I'm just this. I'm just this human being who gets to be on this, gets to be on this planet for the time that I get to be I, like I say I'm, I'm very humbled. I'm very honored. I'm very thankful for everything that I've learned. And as I said, family is important. And I'm also so with that said, when I talk about family, I feel very blessed to have had the relationships that I've had with my aunts, my uncles, my grandparents, of course. Many of those people have passed on. But all of those things I take as... as a blessing. And I've learned from all of those individuals. And so I carry so many lessons with me on a regular basis, and appreciate everything that I have.

Melissa Milner 16:11

Yeah, I think this is a good reminder to teachers who are listening that we can take just our every day passions, like a love for our family and use it in our work. In your work right now. What are you zooming in on? Is there a project in particular or certain students issue you're working on?

Zooming In soundbite

Monique Gnanaratnam 16:35

Honestly, we are zooming in on COVID, the Coronavirus. Very much like our work everyday, you don't know what to expect. With all the planning that we have been doing to prepare for, we just like you all preparing for the school year. It was... it was very different, unlike anything else that any of us have experienced before. And I really found myself challenged. And I came to the conclusion that that was because there was just nothing solid. There was nothing I could lay my hat on and say, Wow, this is like the time we experienced so and so.

Melissa Milner 17:26

Right. Right.

Monique Gnanaratnam

You know, we were... we were making plans. And we still are everybody is in the same boat. Whether it's talking about your work your home life, you're making plans on the foundation of jello.

Yeah.

Monique Gnanaratnam 17:43

It's what it feels like.

Melissa Milner 17:45

Yeah, I agree. Oh, my God.

Monique Gnanaratnam 17:48

At one point, I thought, well, you know, you're making foundations like on you know, you're making plans on a foundation of sand. No, it's not quite that solid, not even shifting sand. It's just like, you just, you just don't, you just don't know. So talk about having faith in one another as human beings, because we really have to depend on one another, to have some type of security, no matter how loose that security may be. What I appreciate every day, is being able to count on my colleagues and that I can call them and we can work through whatever the situation is. I might become quite the quite the guru with zoom. And you know all of that because you're working with the situation and sometimes you quickly have to figure it out, figure out how to bring the therapist into the conversation if you need to. Figure out how to quickly contact the chief of police if I need to, if we need to check on a student's wellness who was living off campus. Really being able to count on the solid foundation that my colleagues and I have built pre- COVID is... is really helpful.

Melissa Milner 19:21

Right? Are all Brandeis students back in? Are they all remote? How? What's happening right now?

Monique Gnanaratnam 19:28

We have a combination.

Melissa Milner 19:30

Okay.

Monique Gnanaratnam 19:31

We have a combination. So we have we have some students who are on campus, some students who are working from home remotely. And we have a hybrid model right now. So you have some students who even though they are living on campus, they may have some classes in person. They have some clap classes that are hybrid, and they have some classes that are strictly remote.

Melissa Milner 19:56

Anything else you want to share with us before I asked the last question?

Monique Gnanaratnam 20:01

There is something that I want to make sure I take the opportunity to say, and that is to be able to give my heart felt thanks to all of the teachers that my children have had the opportunity to engage with. It is a job, that is a huge job. And I can't thank... I can't thank you, and all of the teachers who have been there as a part of my children's education, that would be from preschool on up. And I often think about how I'd like to write a letter write a note, write a card, to thank everybody. And I mean well, but have never had the opportunity to really make that come to fruition. And I want to take this time just to say thank you. This... this work is, is pride and joy work. It's fun work. It's a labor of love. But it also is difficult work. And it takes a lot of time away from your own families and loved ones. And I, I'm a kin to a lot of that in the work that I do. But I have a deep appreciation. And I just want to say thank you.

Melissa Milner 21:37

Well, I'm going to say you're welcome for all the teachers that your two lovely daughters have had and will have. This is the biggest, most important question, what is your favorite movie and why?

Monique Gnanaratnam 21:49

Now? You know, that was so hard and I enjoy all genres. So, everything from fantasy to true stories, you know? So if I have to pick one, I'm going to go with Glory.

Melissa Milner 22:10

Oh my gosh, I love that... that's on my list. That's like a painful, painful movie. Yeah.

Monique Gnanaratnam 22:17

Oh, yes. I love the historical piece. Culture is also very important. And any opportunity to be able to learn about culture is an opportunity to understand people, and what makes us tick. And also to have it also provides a historical view of our country and of our, our world, this place that we call home, this place where we stand. Historical pieces are extremely important. This is one of the movie many movies that provides a connection to the life of African Americans in this country.

Melissa Milner 23:14

I can't thank you enough. You're, first of all, a pleasure to talk to anyway. But you...you just really this was a great interview. Thank you so much.

Monique Gnanaratnam 23:23

Thank you so much for your time, Melissa. This has been wonderful.

Melissa Milner

If you enjoyed this episode, and have not done so already, please hit the subscribe button for The Teacher As... podcast so you can get future episodes. I would love for you to leave a review and a rating as well. If you have time. For my blog, transcripts of this episode, and links to any resources mentioned, visit my website at www.theteacheras.com. You can reach me on Twitter and Instagram @melissabmilner. And I hope you check out The Teacher As... Facebook page for episode updates. I am sending a special thanks to Linda and Lester Fleishman, my mom and dad, for being so supportive. They are the voices you hear in the Zooming In soundbite and my dad composed and performed the background music you are listening to right now. My intro music was Upbeat Party by Scott Holmes. So what are you zooming in on? I would love to hear from you. My hope is that we all share what we are doing in the classroom in order to teach, remind, affirm and inspire each other. Thanks for listening. And that's a wrap.